Dating a recently divorced mother

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And I think that's probably what I've learned the most about dating with children: In the midst of that uncertain whirlwind, figure out what your priorities are, and stick to them.

Let them anchor you to the soil, and hold fast when it feels like you might get swept away.

It turned out to be a gamble worth taking; after his first day with the three of us, my boyfriend turned to me and said, “Syd, those girls are amazing and the fact that you're a mom is one of my favorite things about you."But it hasn't all been so easy; there's still the ex-factor.

I am lucky in the way that my former husband and I have a good relationship, talk regularly about our kids, and he comes to my place almost every weekend to pick them up.

But I couldn't find any brutally honest testimonials describing the way to be both a single mom and a girlfriend without screwing everything (and everyone) up in the process.

Practicing self-care is one of the best ways to become a better caretaker, and dating should be on that list, alongside bubble baths and good friends. They're very loud, very messy, and big on the overshare; they love to announce to people entering my house, “I did a poop on the potty!Despite my wish for a personal life, my children have always remained my number one priority, and I refuse to loosen my grip on that, to compromise their emotional security so I can meet my own (or someone else's) selfish needs.I want them to know that we all have the power to bring what we want into our lives and remove what we don't.Initially when I compared my life (and my appearance) to my boyfriend's, I saw myself beside him as some wrinkled old mom, hunched over and using my last breath to order another time-out; I was sure there was no way he could really love me if he was introduced to that bipolar love-my-kids-to-death-but-sometimes-want-to-kill-them persona that goes with parenting.Because it's not cute; there's legitimately nothing endearing about my greasy messy bun, eye bags, and frequent hoarse yelling at my girls to “Share!

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